Was with her this afternoon. Asked her if she wanted to come over. She said, "What are you drinking?" I said, "Nothing bc of the heart monitor I am wearing." Asked her again a little while later. She said, "Naw..I have some things I need to get done at home and you aren't drinking anyway."
She is the one I am most worried about losing closeness with if I stop drinking. Remember last summer when her and her boyfriend invited me to hang out in Florida for a week. Her boyfriend/husband said, "Only if you are drinking. You aren't any fun if you don't drink." I don't care what he says, but I do care that I remain close with my sister.
How do I stay true to what I know is right for me and still remain close to her if she would rather not hang out if I'm not drinking? And I miss drinking when I am with her. It seriously gives me a panic attack and I get debilitating cravings when I am with her bc it is what we do (did)...we drink.
BTW - she has been the one that I have broken many sobriety attempts with including the 255 days. I don't blame her, other than her insensitive comments. It was always my choice to drink. When I don't drink, I really do miss the relationship we have when we are.
She is my sister. I can't just not see her. How do I deal with this? Any advice??
YUP
ReplyDeleteYour kids.
Period
Michelle xxxx (big hugs)
Maybe ask her to do something that doesn't involve alcohol... like catch a movie you've both been wanting to see or go to lunch at Panera where there's no alcohol on the menu.
ReplyDeleteShe needs to see you on your terms.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds harsh, but it's true.
Like Heidi said, meet her for breakfast or lunch, were there is no alcohol served.
Meet her for coffee.
It's your life, and if she loves you, she will respect you, and want the best for you.
xo
Wendy