Wednesday, November 30, 2011

What is your plan now?

Someone asked me this question.  Someone else told me to save my response for later.

What is your plan now?  I am not sure (just being honest).  Are you quitting, or are you drinking a few on the weekends and none on weekdays? For sure none on the weekdays.  We will see on the weekends.  I really just want to perm abs.  I told myself - one more HO and I was done - it was proof I couldn't control it.   How is it working for you?  Thanksgiving break was an epic fail!  Look at my abstar - it is disgusting! Fell back into my own miserable patterns.  Drank wine!  Wine is terrible for me.  For sure no more wine - ever!  I feel like I want to try to moderate one more time just once or twice a week but with only beer.  Then again - one more HO and I am done!  (As I am typing this there is a little voice in my head saying, "What is it going to take - one more abusive incident and you could have things happen that could change your life forever!  Why risk it!" )  I have been thinking a lot about what you guys say about giving the absing some time so I can actually think more clearly about it.  I am strongly considering doing a 30 (at least).  I have not gone 30 days in 22 years (except when pregnant and when I quit smoking - I quit drinking for 6 months because it was the only way I could quit smoking) 

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