Saturday, June 11, 2016
6/11/16 (Sat) That's It!!!!! Stop Obsessing
I am done feeling sorry for myself. For the last 6 days I have done nothing but be on the computer (albeit reading my self help book, blogging about it and obsessively checking my email) all morning, sit around all afternoon watching stupid daytime reality tv and then dragging myslef to bed only to not be able to sleep. All I am doing is wallowing around in my own depression, obsession and self absorption just waiting for another day to pass!
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!!
i have no idea what I will do 24 days from now! Maybe I will drink while only taking my naltrexone???? Maybe I will just drink and get worse???? Maybe I will not drink at all??? Who the hell knows, but I am drowning in indecisiveness, worry and self-pity.
I need to worry about today - today! What I am I going to do today to have a positive, productive happy day? I will give myself 2 hours per day on the computer bc I do still want to keep working on steps. I will give myself 2 hours a day to watch tv because I am on summer break and who cares? And I will be sober for the next 24 days. I will also work out, walk my dogs, eat well, go to yoga and get some shit done! This is ridiculous and needs to stop!