I am a 51 year old wife, teacher and mother of 2. I have a 21 year old son and a 25 year old daughter. New intro...I am sober and love it! It isn't always easy but it is always worth it! Old intro...I am fighting this damn drug called alcohol. I have been a weekend binge drinker for 30 years. I binge 2-3 times a month on a Friday or Saturday, but alcohol kicks my butt every single day of my life. I am sick of it!
Wednesday, June 8, 2016
6/8/16 (Wed) Day 3 - Miserable
I CAN NOT SLEEP!!! Insomnia is killing me!
3 weeks ago - drank Fri, Sat, Sun evenings and felt crappy Mon, Tues, Wednesday
2 weeks ago - drank Tues, Wed, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun evenings and felt crappy Mon, Tues, Wed
last week - drank Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun evenings and felt crappy Mon, Tues and today
This has been my pattern for as long as I can remember. Not every week but probably 2 of the 4 weeks a month. By Thursday I finally feel better and then guess what I start thinking about....drinking!!! It is just such a stupid, exhausting way to live life and I am tired of it.
This time is particularly bad (it seems to get worse every time). It is Wed and I haven't drank since Sunday but I am dizzy, achy, tingly, sweaty, grumpy, sleepy, exhausted and depressed. And I know, without a doubt, tomorrow or Friday I will feel better and want to drink.
NO...I'm changing that thinking. I don't want to drink anymore. I am tired of feeling this way. I want to feel good next week, be able to sleep, workout and get things done. I want to be proud of myself. I want to be more productive, peaceful, happy and content. I am NEVER going to feel this if I continue the same path I have been on for 30 years. Time to stop kidding myself and get real!
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