Well I didn't post yesterday bc I felt like total shit. 4th hangover of the break and probably up there in one of the top 5 worst hangovers of my life. Went to dinner and had 2 glasses of wine, came home and drank 6!!! hard seltzers! Didn't embarrass myself or do anything stupid. Really didn't feel that drunk at the time but when I went to be ad at 2:00 am the weirdest thing was happening - my whole abdomen was clenching over and over uncontrollably. Not like nauseous/going to throw up feeling - but kind of that same wrenching feeling without feeling sick. It was so weird - just another reason to quit. Yesterday was horrendous - never left the couch.Today I'm exhausted (had stressful dreams all night), my back hurts (from laying around all day), my wrist hurts (from arm wrestling people on New Year's Eve - OMG - are you kidding me?), my stomach is totally messed up and I feel like I am getting a terrible cold. My sister didn't even feel that bad yesterday - so unfair! I did talk to her about my three truths.
1. I am unable to drink normally - she said - that's true. you have a hard time finding the stop button
2. I can't process alcohol in my body anymore - she said - that's true. your hangovers are terrible
3. I feel so much better when I don't drink so I think I am going to quit - she said - that's sad bc I like drinking with you. I said - well that's not very supportive. She said - I know - we'll just have to figure out how to make you have fun sober.
So it is out there, she knows, it is January and everyone knows I don;t drink in January. When February comes I will just announce I have decided that I felt so good in January that I decided to give it up for good.
Thank God yesterday is the last hangover I will ever have to suffer - such a waste of a day.
Alcohol wastes my days, weeks, months, years, life! Time to try living a different way. Time to trust all of you soberistas out there that keep telling me it is so much better.
I'm sooooo ready for a new beginning - a new chapter to my life! I'm going to sleep, eat well, work out, be more patient, post a lot (be when I stop posting - I drink), take care of myself, let my body and brain heal, just be a better version of myself. I choose to let go of this drug that has had me in its grips for so long.
Happy New Year!
2017 is going to be challenging to stay sober but it can't be any worse than 2016 trying to moderate
Day 2 :)
I understand you more than you can imagine. We are in this together. I've been blogging as Granny Gets Sober and Sober at Sixty for years with no long term abstinence. I am committed to one year sober to see what it actually feels like to get the monkey off my back. We can do this!! Love ourselves first.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to do this this time. I am determined. Let's do it together :)
DeleteYou can do this.
ReplyDeleteI know I can.
DeleteThere really is a happier life!
ReplyDeleteI know about the stomach pain! I had that, too!
xo
Wendy