http://www.stopdrinkingexpert.com/sick-tired-drinking/
The above link it all about what it is all about for me. SLEEP! When I am drinking I do not sleep well. I'm talking about drinking only on the weekends and maybe only enough to have a hangover maybe once a month. Putting even this amount of a drug into my body on a regular basis has a profound effect on the quantity of good quality sleep I am able to get. In this video he talks about getting 10 hours of sleep after drinking but still feeling tired. I was tired all of the time, no matter how much sleep I was getting. The lack of quality sleep I was getting was affecting my anxiety, depression, mood, motivation and will power to not drink. I think I just get too tired to fight the fight.
I am slowly starting to come out of my drug induced sleep deprivation. I am starting to remember that feeling of crawling into bed with a smile, feeling how good the sheets feel and just be happy to be in bed. I used to just basically fall into bed and pass out even Monday -Thursday when I was sober - just feeling so utterly and completely exhausted. I am stating to remember the feeling of sleeping a solid 7-8 hours without waking up. The feeling of waking up in the morning, stretching, feeling how incredibly comfortable my bed is. Waking up with a smile, thinking about what I need to get accomplished for the day. It used to be just waking up many times in the night and then still feeling tired in the morning, worried about how I am going to get everything done in the day.
I LOVE SLEEPING :)
Amen sister!!!!!
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