I am a 50 year old wife, teacher and mother of 2. I have a 19 year old son and a 23 year old daughter. I am fighting this damn drug called alcohol. I have been a weekend binge drinker for 30 years. I binge 2-3 times a month on a Friday or Saturday, but alcohol kicks my butt every single day of my life. I am sick of it!
Monday, January 23, 2012
Day 30 - One more thing...
After 20 years of weekend binge drinking at least 2 times a month (which was also getting closer and closer to daily drinking) and trying soooooo hard to moderate... trike, fabs, abs, count, wait, slow down, eat, etc. for two years - I know that my path is abstinence. It has taken my a long time and a lot of fighting with myself, but I feel a great sense of peace to be able to say this. I can finally be the person I knew I could be. I can be the role model, the one people look up to and are proud of. I can finally be proud of myself.
For all of you who are successfully moderating - good for you. There is a part of my that is jealous and I know how hard it is. For those of you who are exhausted broken, beaten down, tired of the fight...there is another way. I never thought I could be abstinate, and I am only on day 30 of forever, but I am, a this moment, at peace... something I have been longing for my whole life. We all have our own path...this is mine.