Friday, February 3, 2012

Snow Day

Yes, I am still here...and... no, I have not drank - I think something like 40 days.  I am feeling pretty good.  Physically, I am finally starting to feel like 7-8 hours of sleep is enough when I wake up in the morning.  Emotionally, I feel a little more even.  I still get upset sometimes, but I actually am now expressing it because when I was drinking, I always wondered if it was just me being too sensitive because I was HO. 

I am struggling a little today, however.  I was always a happy drinker.  I didn't drink when i was angry, sad or upset.  For me, it was part of celebrations.  Well, today is a SNOW DAY!!! and i am a teacher.  Now that is a reason to celebrate.  Better yet, it is a snow day on a Friday!!!  I keep thinking, man, I would have definitely been thinking about getting my drink on.  Not drinking this morning (I never drank before like 4:00 pm) but setting the plans in motion to have a party tonight.  I would be texting my friends in the neighborhood seeing what they were doing later.  Snow day today, no school tomorrow (don't have to get up) and then one more day to recover before Monday (or maybe got to a Super Bowl party)!!!  Let's get this party started!!! That is how I would have been feeling.

I am glad I am not drinking, but I don't know what to do with those feelings of - Well this just doesn't seem as fun as would of in the past.  it feels like my abstinence just took a little wind out of my sails - took a little joy out of my step,  just doesn't seem as fun.

I know that it is what I want, I know I would be really mad at myself tomorrow for drinking, I know there are plenty of other things  I can do with my time, I know all of that, just sayin....


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2 comments:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 3, 2012 at 11:55 AM

    Why not just invite your neighborhood friends for a party anyway. Maybe suggest movie night or game night. I am just finding out how much fun one can have sober. I've also noticed that no one seems to notice I'm not drinking. The first get-together I had, I made a fancy fruit punch in a pitcher and many adults drank that instead of alcohol....I didn't stand out at all. And, I had a great time!

    It has been such a relief to me to figure out that I can be sober at events where there is drinking and actually have more fun. Most importantly, not one person has commented on me not drinking. The latest thing was a bowling party. Who bowls without beer? I found out it actually more fun without the beer!

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  2. Mrs DFebruary 6, 2012 at 1:08 AM

    Yeah, just do what you would normally do, every single thing the same, friends, food, drink, it just so happens that your glass has a non-alcoholic drink in it. That booze didn't make your night special, your friends did and so did the snow! And the weekend! You're doing just great. Take care xxx

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