Sunday, April 21, 2013

What's the point?

I have been struggling for quite some time with finding the point of everything.  You get up, get ready, go to work, come home, make dinner, go to bed...day after day after day.  On the weekends...clean the house, do the laundry, go to the grocery store, pay the bills...week after week after week.  What is the point?  Is this all there is to life?

I really don't think anything was really that different when I was drinking except I got together with friends on Friday and Saturday nights and drank.  It just gave me something to look forward to.  They are all still drinking on the weekend and it is just wither too hard for me or I get bored with being around them.

I don't know if it is a mid life crisis, empty nest (my kids aren't gone but often are gone doing there own thing), pouting about not being able to drink, I don't know...I just know I am incredibly bored and starting to get seriously depressed.

I know alcohol isn't the answer, but I can't figure out what is.

BTW - I didn't drink last night.

6 comments:

  1. Hi
    Well done for not drinking last night you know it's not the answer and it's great that you are still writing about it. There is a great Bubble Hour (huge respect for those ladies) podcast about relapse and the symptoms you are describing/experiencing. Have a listen, it might help.
    Hope it does
    Carrie

    ReplyDelete
  2. I completely relate to your post. I quit drinking July 15th and while I'm grateful for so much sobriety, I often wonder, is this it? Getting together for drinks and parties gave me a reason to live. I've been filling my life with volunteer work, self education, and new forms of entertainment. Some days it still feels like something is missing. My partner and I are going to start the process of having a baby sometime this year and I'm thinking that will give me a new sense of purpose. I often wish that religion came more naturally to me. Reading support blogs and AA helps. I also didn't drink daily, go to rehab, get the shakes, drink in the morning, etc. And I thought because my life is was good in all other aspects that I couldn't be alcoholic. Went to a meeting and meet lots of other educated, financially stable women. :) Good job on not drinking last night! Best wishes on your sober journey.

    ReplyDelete
  3. And thanks for blogging, it helps me a lot!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi k,
    I was just wondering how you are doing? Do you have big plans for the summer? Email me anytime if you want, I'd love to hear from you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. How are you getting along?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey K! We were in MM. You "graduated" and I stuck around MM and drank myself sick a little longer. Sept 2, 2012 is when I realized that moderation wasn't going to work for me. I've slipped a few times, but was able to pull myself back up quickly. Just wondered how your summer has been. MarkWI

    ReplyDelete